Forgive me if I'm passionate, forgive me if I'm true to who I am, forgive me if I stay consistent, but I personal am not ashamed of any of these things. I love her, and I'm proud of her, and I feel like she has me in a position where I can't tell her either of these things to her face without catching some sort of backlash somehow, and I hate that because I'm a positive person by nature.
Yes, I hold back when I disagree with her, yes, I've never had to stand up to her and argue, yes, I've not had to have a shout out argument, yes, I've never had to put her in her place, but the reason isn't because I can't, but the reason is I don't think it's ever been my place yet. I'm her friend, and I have never been her man, unless if I was her man nobody told me I was, but since I've never been officially her man, I've never felt it right or my place to stand up to her like that. And honestly, love shouldn't be about a man putting her in her place, and it shouldn't be about her pushing her man to snap like that to begin with. Love is something that should be mutually appreciated and respected by both. Love is compromise, love is not putting up with someone just because you're afraid of not finding someone better, love is about finding someone you can't live without. That's how I know I love her, I don't really want to experience life without her.
Seeing her today was wonderful, and there is nothing more beautiful to me then seeing her better herself by going to school or moving up with her job and such, that to me is truly the meaning of sexy. And I can't tell her that, but deep down I truly am proud of her, and I want to support that in her, and honestly that is why I love her. I feel she gave up on me way to soon, I feel she felt she messed things up too bad, but she didn't, if anything she didn't try hard enough to make things work with us. As a man, I'm a provider, I won't con people or bust heads persay, I won't intentionally piss her off or talk down to her to keep her, no, instead I will do my best to find consistent work to provide consistent money to support our family, I will do whatever I can to support her growth and our family's growth, I won't work to be famous or powerful, but I will work to be a good family man for us both, I will do what I have to to be what we need and not so much what we want.
Today reminded me how much I want to be a father, how much I want a family of my own, and how much I love her and everything about her, and how much nothing about her matters to me except what we have now and in the future. I'm not perfect, and if we were together there would be times we would argue, and there would be times I would have to stand up to her, and believe me I would, but you won't see that side of me until you commit to me. And you wonder why I stay silent and don't say certain things to your face, and it's simple, it has never been my place yet, if we were together I would say anything to your face, and honestly you'd probably be the only person I'd truly tell anything to, but you've never taken the chance to find out that part of me, because you've never officially given us a chance.
This may sound cocky, but I truly believe it. I am the one, and you are the one for me, I truly believe we are meant to be. I can't give any solid facts why, except that's how strong my love feels for you and true it is. It's why I don't give up on you, it's why I don't force it, it's why I hold it in when around you, because I don't want to break it. You are the only person I get nervous talking to because I don't want to screw it up, you give me butterflies in a good way and always have. I love you, and no matter what our past is, I will always want to be with you for life. All you have to do is make it official, but until then, I will remain a friend who will never abandon you. We have something so special, a bond nobody understands but us, let's not waste that, but rather embrace it, there our people alive who will never find someone like we have in each other, someone that even as a friend would stick by us until the end. I love you on a level you don't yet understand, I am everything you have been looking for, you just haven't found out yet. I'm not saying anything bad about anyone else, I'm only saying how great my love for you truly is. I miss our talks, I miss our time together, you made me feel whole always. Even when I had nothing, I had you in my life, and that to me meant everything.
Yes, I hold back when I disagree with her, yes, I've never had to stand up to her and argue, yes, I've not had to have a shout out argument, yes, I've never had to put her in her place, but the reason isn't because I can't, but the reason is I don't think it's ever been my place yet. I'm her friend, and I have never been her man, unless if I was her man nobody told me I was, but since I've never been officially her man, I've never felt it right or my place to stand up to her like that. And honestly, love shouldn't be about a man putting her in her place, and it shouldn't be about her pushing her man to snap like that to begin with. Love is something that should be mutually appreciated and respected by both. Love is compromise, love is not putting up with someone just because you're afraid of not finding someone better, love is about finding someone you can't live without. That's how I know I love her, I don't really want to experience life without her.
Seeing her today was wonderful, and there is nothing more beautiful to me then seeing her better herself by going to school or moving up with her job and such, that to me is truly the meaning of sexy. And I can't tell her that, but deep down I truly am proud of her, and I want to support that in her, and honestly that is why I love her. I feel she gave up on me way to soon, I feel she felt she messed things up too bad, but she didn't, if anything she didn't try hard enough to make things work with us. As a man, I'm a provider, I won't con people or bust heads persay, I won't intentionally piss her off or talk down to her to keep her, no, instead I will do my best to find consistent work to provide consistent money to support our family, I will do whatever I can to support her growth and our family's growth, I won't work to be famous or powerful, but I will work to be a good family man for us both, I will do what I have to to be what we need and not so much what we want.
Today reminded me how much I want to be a father, how much I want a family of my own, and how much I love her and everything about her, and how much nothing about her matters to me except what we have now and in the future. I'm not perfect, and if we were together there would be times we would argue, and there would be times I would have to stand up to her, and believe me I would, but you won't see that side of me until you commit to me. And you wonder why I stay silent and don't say certain things to your face, and it's simple, it has never been my place yet, if we were together I would say anything to your face, and honestly you'd probably be the only person I'd truly tell anything to, but you've never taken the chance to find out that part of me, because you've never officially given us a chance.
This may sound cocky, but I truly believe it. I am the one, and you are the one for me, I truly believe we are meant to be. I can't give any solid facts why, except that's how strong my love feels for you and true it is. It's why I don't give up on you, it's why I don't force it, it's why I hold it in when around you, because I don't want to break it. You are the only person I get nervous talking to because I don't want to screw it up, you give me butterflies in a good way and always have. I love you, and no matter what our past is, I will always want to be with you for life. All you have to do is make it official, but until then, I will remain a friend who will never abandon you. We have something so special, a bond nobody understands but us, let's not waste that, but rather embrace it, there our people alive who will never find someone like we have in each other, someone that even as a friend would stick by us until the end. I love you on a level you don't yet understand, I am everything you have been looking for, you just haven't found out yet. I'm not saying anything bad about anyone else, I'm only saying how great my love for you truly is. I miss our talks, I miss our time together, you made me feel whole always. Even when I had nothing, I had you in my life, and that to me meant everything.
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