So there are times certain thoughts and feelings come through you, sometimes they leave immediately and we brush them off, but then there are times they linger and really make you think there is something more to them. This is going to sound like I'm down on myself, but really it isn't that at all, it's just me looking at where I'm at and seeing what I see. As the years pass by and I grow older and things haven't changed in the ways I wish them too, I realize I will probably never be married, probably never experience a family of my own, and probably never have kids of my own. And this breaks my heart to the core, because those who know me know that these dreams are the most important dreams in my life.
I only want these dreams with one person I confess, she is my everything, and I love her with all I am and all my life. And I believe we can and will be one day, but time is definitely ticking away, and while we might be one day, and she will be more than enough to bring me happiness, I realize if too much time passes the rest of dream grows less and less likely. I am the very definition of a giving heart, I will always place myself second, and I'm ok with that. I refuse to walk over people, I just believe we all matter in life and that none of us should ever treat anyone as less than ourselves.
I'm a very shy and guarded person, I don't let many people in my heart or world, they few I let in I would do anything with them or for them, but only for them and not in front of anyone else I haven't let into my heart. And the truth is, I often times don't know when I'm letting someone in because it kind of just happens.
There is absolutely nothing fake about me, I am who I am. And I will always stand by who I am, and those I love, I will always tell you where we stand, though I admit I choose my moments carefully. And there are times I realize silence is better than hurting someone. If you want all of me, if you want to break my shell, then you have to claim me and make that effort. I'm not the guy you will grab your ass or make crude comments, unless you've committed yourself to me already and claimed me, rather I'm the guy who will respect you, help you, compliment you, and always stand by you, and never forget you, I will text you good morning and good night without fail, I will try and motivate you at all costs, but to get more out of me, to get me physical, to get the fun side out of me, I need more from you, I need to know you want it, I need to know you want me and are ready to claim me. If you don't do your part, believe me I will not take that step, it isn't who I am.
I'm a true gentleman first, and a lover second. Unlike most men, sex is not the first thing on my mind, I'm searching for something much more real and long lasting. I want happiness, success, a woman I can laugh and cry with, someone who I am enough for and she is enough for me, someone who smiles, someone who loves to play around, someone who wants to spend time with me as I do with her, and if all those line up right, then comes the sex part. I'm not easy to get into bed, I'm just not, I have a lot more self respect to be like that. If someone gets me to that point, I want them to know they did something special. I feel the more you give yourself away, then the more you devalue yourself, you become that cheap steak that anyone can afford, I prefer to be the expensive steak that only those who earn it can obtain.
I'm a tricky person, there is no one key to my heart, and often times it just happens. The woman I love more than anything, got into my heart in a way I never saw coming. She broke so many of my rules it's crazy. Before her, I wouldn't date a woman with kids, I wouldn't date outside my race, I wouldn't sate anyone more than 5 years younger or older than me, I wouldn't date anyone taller than me, I wouldn't date anyone I work with, yet despite all this, she became the one and only love in my life. And to this day, she is now perfection to me, God changed my heart for her, and to me that tells me how real this love is, it tells me God approves. That is the part few realize, what it took for her to get into my heart, she worked hard for this, and she did show masterfully. I would not be who I am today without her, she changed me more than she ever realizes, and that is amazing. I will never give up on being her until I die, even if it means my dreams never come true, I will wait for her forever. Nobody can ever change my heart or mind. At least I admit this. I'm not sure any other man she ever meets will ever admit all this to her, or let her change him as I have let her change me. I'm all in on her, and I wouldn't have it any other way. What she has in me is something very few people ever have in life.
I only want these dreams with one person I confess, she is my everything, and I love her with all I am and all my life. And I believe we can and will be one day, but time is definitely ticking away, and while we might be one day, and she will be more than enough to bring me happiness, I realize if too much time passes the rest of dream grows less and less likely. I am the very definition of a giving heart, I will always place myself second, and I'm ok with that. I refuse to walk over people, I just believe we all matter in life and that none of us should ever treat anyone as less than ourselves.
I'm a very shy and guarded person, I don't let many people in my heart or world, they few I let in I would do anything with them or for them, but only for them and not in front of anyone else I haven't let into my heart. And the truth is, I often times don't know when I'm letting someone in because it kind of just happens.
There is absolutely nothing fake about me, I am who I am. And I will always stand by who I am, and those I love, I will always tell you where we stand, though I admit I choose my moments carefully. And there are times I realize silence is better than hurting someone. If you want all of me, if you want to break my shell, then you have to claim me and make that effort. I'm not the guy you will grab your ass or make crude comments, unless you've committed yourself to me already and claimed me, rather I'm the guy who will respect you, help you, compliment you, and always stand by you, and never forget you, I will text you good morning and good night without fail, I will try and motivate you at all costs, but to get more out of me, to get me physical, to get the fun side out of me, I need more from you, I need to know you want it, I need to know you want me and are ready to claim me. If you don't do your part, believe me I will not take that step, it isn't who I am.
I'm a true gentleman first, and a lover second. Unlike most men, sex is not the first thing on my mind, I'm searching for something much more real and long lasting. I want happiness, success, a woman I can laugh and cry with, someone who I am enough for and she is enough for me, someone who smiles, someone who loves to play around, someone who wants to spend time with me as I do with her, and if all those line up right, then comes the sex part. I'm not easy to get into bed, I'm just not, I have a lot more self respect to be like that. If someone gets me to that point, I want them to know they did something special. I feel the more you give yourself away, then the more you devalue yourself, you become that cheap steak that anyone can afford, I prefer to be the expensive steak that only those who earn it can obtain.
I'm a tricky person, there is no one key to my heart, and often times it just happens. The woman I love more than anything, got into my heart in a way I never saw coming. She broke so many of my rules it's crazy. Before her, I wouldn't date a woman with kids, I wouldn't date outside my race, I wouldn't sate anyone more than 5 years younger or older than me, I wouldn't date anyone taller than me, I wouldn't date anyone I work with, yet despite all this, she became the one and only love in my life. And to this day, she is now perfection to me, God changed my heart for her, and to me that tells me how real this love is, it tells me God approves. That is the part few realize, what it took for her to get into my heart, she worked hard for this, and she did show masterfully. I would not be who I am today without her, she changed me more than she ever realizes, and that is amazing. I will never give up on being her until I die, even if it means my dreams never come true, I will wait for her forever. Nobody can ever change my heart or mind. At least I admit this. I'm not sure any other man she ever meets will ever admit all this to her, or let her change him as I have let her change me. I'm all in on her, and I wouldn't have it any other way. What she has in me is something very few people ever have in life.
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